Honestly, one of the very first thoughts that went through my mind as we were breaking up (which, I’m pretty sure I actually said out loud) was “but what will I do without this coffee???” 3) When I first went over mafia-guy’s condo a couple months back I knew immediately things were not going to work between us. I’m sorry, maybe that makes me a snob, and maybe I will miss out on a lot of great people based on their drink choice, but seriously?? I am completely Type-A, OCD, organized, list making, etc.
Originally, my master plan was to go to med school so that I could find myself a doctor but the fact that I literally pass out (and have to be rushed to the hospital in an ambulance in front of hundreds of my high school peers on a marching band trip in 10th grade) at the sight of blood sort of foiled that plan. Today I received a picture of him in a hammock on the beach. Still, that has the potential of some risky business. Then I thought about it, and he actually wasn’t all that cute, but the fact that he was providing me with my coffee took him up like 50 levels in the cuteness factor.So I got a big kick out that and kept saying ‘OMG, your name is GEOFF, WITH A G’. When we got home we asked how much it cost and he said it was however much you wanted to pay! Ok so here is a tutorial of how to use the pro/con list: Clearly, things did not work out between us.My friends all got out to give him but I was like ‘no way guys, that was epic and hilarious and awesome! I have grand plans to find a cute study buddy and then seduce him. Also, I fear that my self-deprecating humor gets old. He’s been on vacation in Florida and we’ve been bbm-ing so I’ll take that as a good sign. Today, while I was ordering from the coffee shop next to my apartment I realized that the barista was pretty cute! I should have just turned around then, but no, instead I decided to set myself up for over 2 hours of lackluster, boring conversations. I did however thoroughly enjoy watching the penguins play because they are my favorite and just so stinking cute the way the waddle around and then dive into the water! I’m pretty sure that my enthusiasm for the penguins might have scared him a bit….especially when I told him about how my work has an instant message system with emoticons and how much I love the one of the dancing penguin. And then when we moved on to the polar bears I told him that they are my favorite type of bear because my teddy bear is a polar bear and he has on an argyle sweater and hat!! Note to self: do not mention teddy bears or dance like a penguin on my next date. And he hasn’t called me since, so for once I’m on the same page with someone! In other news, I have started studying for the GMAT so that I can go back to get my MBA part-time starting sometime in 2011. 84% fueled by my hope that I will meet a smart, single, attractive, man in the process. I have not been on a date since the one with the Personal Trainer (PT) last week. That crazy guy who kept calling me after our horrendous date. There is an amazing place right next to my office that has the best coffee I have ever tasted—the problem is it is .50 for 12 ounces. Don’t worry, I limit myself to once a week, but still… If however you mock me for being a ‘vale Victorian’ I will sneak out of the bathroom window. ” follow up text from me and when I hadn’t heard from him for a few days I naively believed I was off the hook with that one. He called twice Sunday (I didn’t respond), texted twice Monday (I responded with– “This week is super busy. Oh, well, lesson learned…next time I’m just going to be like “sorry, I just don’t think it’s going to work out.” Oyy. My guy friends were all super jealous that I was crusing around in Lambos and Bentelys even though that really means nothing to me. Last week I decided to take one more quick browse at Jdate and found someone actually interesting. It would just be so absolutely fantastic if I could actually like and date someone who was Jewish and a Democrat. But, alas, despite the hopes and prayers of my entire family, that just has never been the case. I think the sole reason he let me borrow it was for the inevitable “holy crap. i think i’m dead’ text that was sent 9 minutes after I finished. If you’ve never heard of my university you lose points because I worked so damn hard to get there and it’s a great school, but you’re not out of the running. Ok, now I’m just all worked up and frazzled so that’s the end of this post. Anyway, there was obviously no “thanks again, I had a great time! Ok, so I know that I handled the situation extremely wrong because I should have just been straight-up honest from the beginning, but I just get so uncomfortable with situations like that, especially because he was just so freaking awkward and I just didn’t want to deal with it. The people on it are literally the most awkward human beings in existence. Although, it was sort of fun dating the Mafia guy for a few weeks and pretending I was a millionaire. And then this morning I woke up and did the Insanity dvd that my friend let me borrow.Let’s just say that first morning when I woke up there and had no coffee to drink I knew that things with him would not last long. This guy was so, so funny through our emails but then when I actually met him I swear to you, I have never met a more awkward person. Usually when someone says “so, do you have any siblings” the other person responds with a “yes” or “no” and if yes, will most likely go into some detail…then will say “what about you? We ended up walking tired, that we didn’t want to walk back. I spotted one of those bike-taxis and hailed it down. Of course we started chatting with him, only to find out that his name was Geoffrey Slagheap. He let me down easy telling me “it’s the end of the season, maybe next year…” Umm, it was July.A few things here: 1) At the time like 5 guys I was either hooking up with/had a crush on/had a crush on me had a name that started with a G or J. Regardless, it was the most fun 7 minutes I had all summer! And here are a few pictures I have of this epic night… Thanks.) Ok, anyway…so he picks me up and when he didn’t even get out of the car to greet me I knew that this was just not going to work. It also could be do to the fact that because of my Body for Life challenge I did lunges holding 20lb dumbbells the other day and am currently hobbling around like an 80 year old man. He’s pretty cute but I have that pit-of-my-stomach bad feeling that he’s like 17. SO no alcohol or junk for me until I’m back to normal! I am contemplating funny responses and welcome your suggestions. There is nothing more comforting and delicious to me than a hot cup of good coffee. Now that I am thinking about it though, that is a bit strange that both of my Jdate guys took me on a date to the zoo. (Dad, will you please call me when you read this and let me know your opinion on the matter. That could be due to the fact that my face for some reason thinks I am a teenager again and is breaking out like crazy, which could be due to the fact that even though I am supposed to be doing Body for Life, I accidentally ate a pint of birthday cake ice cream for dinner last night. There is a cute guy that works at the front desk and we talk sometimes. A little older than my 24-27 range but I’m trying not to be so picky. ” I have never been one to lack commentary, but I have no words. Now, I’m not talking “oh, I love coffee because it wakes me up” but more like “I am obsessed with coffee and would sooner give up the internet and my cell phone than have to live without coffee.” The boost of caffeine is just an added bonus.