It is important to get a feel of each other’s skin and let the feeling seep in to create the excitement of impending sexual activity. It is going a mile ahead with your sexual relationship according to the rulebook, as you are allowing yourself to the penultimate stage to the hyped act of intercourse. This is the ultimate touchdown where you both involve yourself in intercourse.
For a heterosexual relationship, it unequivocally means genital insertion which changes according to every sexual preference.
But the Americans have not yet spread the base count on that, so let us stick to conventions, shall we?
Okay, so that was a crash course of the four-base theory in the dating business.
I just threw it on last minute.” When you date other moms, you wear tees and yoga pants and say, “Oh this old thing? This is a tricky base because your kids are now on home court and your new friend is going to see your daughter body slam her toddler to the ground and take back the toy that he just picked up. By third base, I’m full frontal hugging, so prepare for that. You can actually meet at a restaurant, movie theater, coffee shop, or bookstore and talk.
My toddler just threw up on it.” I’ve recently met a new friend and I was thinking about our budding mom-lationship. And just like the other kind of dating, there are bases. She will see the layer of dried-on grime coating your kid’s chair at the table, and she will notice the unflushed dooky from your son’s morning dump. If you’re my third base friend, get ready for our boobs smashed up together while I ask how you’re doing right in your ear.
You make encouraging comments about each others’ kids as they scream hysterically and hit each other with kick boards and pretend light sabers. (Upon reading this, my husband informed me, “Who are you kidding? You go for full frontal hugging on first base.” So I’m a hug-slut.
I like to go ahead and act a little weird on first base, just to give them a taste for where they’re headed if they stick with me. ” Second base is a park play date outside of scheduled activities.
I’m terrible at small talk, so if I survive this phase with another mom, then I know she’s either desperate for a friend or really into me. At this point, you’re hanging out because you want to and you set it up ahead of time.
When you were dating your man, you wore incredible outfits and said, “Oh this old thing? If you love gluten-free, feel free to talk about it. Just don’t start talking in absolutes, making broad, generalizing statements, because you may never make it to third. They might feel like this: Third base is a play date at one of our houses. You better have the relational stamina for this kind of commitment. Just because you want to, not because you’re killing time while your kids do their thing. One fourth-base mom date will last me for a couple of months.
When you date other moms, you pack extra baggies of healthy snacks and push doors open with your face while schlepping car seats. Never use while discussing homeschooling, gluten, gun control, breastfeeding, marriage, red dye number 40, infertility, or Jesus. If there’s a subject that might cause you to stop blinking and/or breathing, save it for fourth base and don’t unleash it at the park. Feel free to bust out your full-blown honk laugh, talk about how soy gives you diarrhea, and how you worry that you’re a crappy mom. There’s dessert, staying out till the security guard kicks you out of the mall parking lot, and no walk of shame as you crawl into bed next to your racked out hubs. Dating for moms is super fun, and you just might get lucky.